3 weeks and counting!

Tanner is 3 weeks old and is getting bigger!  When friends or family see him, they always comment on how small he is.  But I look at him and see how much he's grown!  His cheeks are fillling out, he's getting stronger, and just bigger in general.  It's awful!  It's such a cliche, but it's so true-- they grow up way too fast!!

I had to dress him in this for the Superbowl the other week.  Ian was so excited for Tanner's first football game.  Too bad he slept through most of it!  But the rest of us had fun eating pizza downstairs in front of the tv, watching the game.

I love how he curls up so small.  Unfortunately he curls up so much that he gets lost in his blankets and swaddlers!  

It's amazing to see the change in just these past few weeks.  I feel like we're getting on more of a schedule with him-- especially with feeding. (WARNING: Breastfeeding conversation ahead) Feeding is always an issue with my kids-- Tanner being no exception.  Our plan for him was to nurse him, then top him off with formula.  Tanner would get very frustrated when trying to nurse, so I would start with a bit from the bottle, then nurse him, then end with the bottle.  It was crazy going back and forth and back and forth.  And the amount he took from the bottle varied each time.  And when I pumped, I would have varied success-- sometimes getting over an ounce, sometimes getting absolutely nothing.  It was very frustrating.  During the past week, Tanner would have crazy crying fits and I think that this is the reason-- his feeding was so sporadic and he was often hungry, even though I had just fed him.  I never knew how much he was getting.  So, we have slowly transitioned to formula-only feeding.  I continued to pump a few times each day, per doctor recommendation- although we both knew that my milk could dry up quickly, which it did.  Two days later, there was practically nothing left.  I feel good about feeding him formula because I know exactly how much he's getting.  And Tanner seems to be much happier.  However, there is always a part of me that feels saddened and maybe even a bit guilty that I wasn't able to breastfeed like I feel I "should have been able to."  But then the weekend comes around and Brent gets up to do the middle of the night feedings and I feel just fine about this decision!

Overall, Tanner is a good baby.  We have our moments when we both just want to cry.  (Yes, sometimes I join him in crying!)  I think we're entering that stage where he cries and cries for no reason.  It's a hard stage, but I'm trying to figure out how to handle it.  The other night Brent was playing basketball and then running to the store for me.  Tanner cried for almost an hour and a half.  But I managed!  Success!  It's all a learning process, and we're doing ok!